Armed bandits rob Wells Fargo Bank, 250 Long Beach Ave.
By Doris Molo
Two bank robbers, one wielding a gun, entered Wells Fargo
bank in Long Beach
at 9:15 on Tuesday, March 12.
According to information obtained from witnesses by
Detective John Smith of the Long Beach
police department, customers and employees were told to “hit the floor”. The robbers were in disguise and worked
quickly.
Jolene Fergerson, the teller that the robber approached and
demanded cash was able to ascertain that the robber was Black and had a scar on
his left cheek; other than that,
she remembered that he had a “very big gun” pointed at her
face.
Jose Hernandez, a customer, described the robbers as young
and strong. and said one of the robbers as possibly being Latino. Mr. Hernandez also said he spotted a green
American made car parked across the street, but could not be certain it was involved
in the robbery.
An eye witness outside the bank, Stella Rivera, said she saw
a green car traveling at a high speed, heading west on Long Beach Blvd. She said she saw 3 men in the car, a Caucasian
man at the wheel, possibly in his late twenties or early thirties. The car made a right, toward the 91 freeway.
Police are still looking for the assailants. If you have any information, please contact
the Long Beach
police department.
Your news story is very good. Your description is economical - no wasted words, and your paragraphs are airtight. The only sentence I'd change is this one:
ReplyDelete"Jolene Fergerson, the teller that the robber approached and demanded cash was able to ascertain that the robber was Black and had a scar on his left cheek; other than that, she remembered that he had a “very big gun” pointed at her face."
I'd change that to "One man approached teller Jolene Fergerson and demanded cash. She said he was black and had a large scar on his left cheek. Other than that, all she remembered he had "a very big gun."
This a good solid little news story.
Grade: 95